fool of forgiveness

I’m a survivor
A hoarder of pain
The fool of forgiveness
Forgiving those
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it's funny
the socially unexceptable
and tickling my brain
and my mouth drops open
...

it burns to see you
every day
to act like everythink is okay
and yet have to look in your eyes and not fall
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i hear you're married now
forgotten me
you're happy now.
...

it's that time when your heart stops
when you don't want it to
when your breathing seems too quick
when you feeling yourself turn red
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Hands on my back
Hands on my face
Cradling me
in your embrace
we’re alone
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i have no motivation
nothing to write
because you are no where in sight
nothing to say
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lips gliding on lips
hands on skin
breathing on my tongue
gasping for breath
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Your eyes enchant me
Your eyes glide over me
In mid thought
And your eyes wander
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soft and calming
drowning
and drowsy
lulling in sleep
...

I made my own heart break
Let myself believe
That something could happen
Something between us.
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It’s that groggy feeling of snot clogging up your brain
Spilling out your nose
Running out your ears
And coming out of your eyes as tears.
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heating of the head
heating of the brain
the bang
bang
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cloggs are working
pen is scraping the paper
mind is realing
fingers drumbing
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time is free
no work to do
get ahead
with things you're not ment to do
...

the soft flesh
covered in seeds
crunching in my teeth
the red juices
...

Do you know that feeling?
The one you want to share?
The one where you feel;
You could do anything, go anywhere?
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chewing at my ear
not making sense
talking to me like i care
laughing and talking
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this is for my little sister, she is always going with the flow at school, doing what her friends do. but the her that's her friends clone isn't as beautiful as the her that i know. I just want people to know that they're just as beautiful as themselves..... better even.

where are you going?
what are you doing?
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I’m replaced
Not important
Old news
Yesterday.
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