Flying Lemming Poems

The tourist laughed as he thought of the native that made a deal
And swapped an uncut diamond for a Rolex that wasn’t real
He took the diamond and sold it, gaining a pile of cash
And gambled and went to bars and frittered away his stash
...

I got to ‘A’ and was assaulted and abused
And attacked and ambushed and anger was used
And acute agony left me anxious and bemused
...

ITS ODD THT WTH AL TH MBL PHNS
MR PPL R TLKNG EACH DY
TXT MSSGS BEING SNT THRU TH AIR
VRYBDY HS SO MCH 2 SY
...

I saw the ghost I know its true
I know you doubt me like you do
But it stood there as clear as you
Big and bold and scary
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I have a tiny army of little people here
Wherever I go, I know, they are always near
Not one of them is more than an inch in height
Following me all day and guarding me at night
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You may have never heard of me but I have passed by you
Slinking around quietly is what I’m designed to do
Unnoticed, I’ve taunted you, I’m very sure of that
For I’m the mythical mystical magnetic cat
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The wall that still needs painting
The garden that needs some work
The exercise and training which I now just seem to shirk
The cleaning, polishing, dusting
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I’ve evolved over generations
Many countries and many nations
Resulting in a glorious thing
With beauty of grace, style and wing
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I sit and wait, the pressure great
The tension in the air
And now I find, that in my mind
I’m turning to despair
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An easy task I thought it was, a simple thing to do
I wandered off to the shops to get me some shampoo
Rows and rows of plastic bottles, of all shapes and sizes
Some to enhance what you have, and others as disguises
...