Flora Xavier

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Flora Xavier Biography

My name is flora. Im from new york but i was born i florida. I was adopted from my parents as a baby cause my birth mom was 16 and had no idea how to raise a child. She didn't want me so she tried to abort me but her da wouldn't let her. Scared and the baby daddy no where to be found she did drugs and drank a lot out of despair and to try to het rid of me herself but I'm a survivor and I'm here to share my story like all of you. I have a lot of problems that i have learned to live with such as my adoptive mom being an abusive alcoholic and my dad not giving a fuck but there is always a silver lining. In a few days i will be of to the college of my dreams where ill be away from all of this and will start a new chapter in my life. I hope to become friends with all if you and read your stories)

The Best Poem Of Flora Xavier

Empty Inside

the impelling emptiness inside is devouring. it feels as though my sole has been ripped out of my body and its never coming back. first john. i didn't want it to be like this. no contact. I'm dead to him. i wish i could change it all. i wish i could take back the things i said the things i did. but i can't. i hurt him and i don't know if i can ever forgive myself. someone as young as him didn't need to go the way i did. i just hope he's alright. and then theres charlie. my first real love. left me like the first time i guess ill never learn from my mistakes with him. but honestly i don't even know if i love him anymore. again its the emptiness that fills me. maybe thats why i get drunk all the time now or get high. maybe its the impending knowledge that I'm eventually gunna havta break up with paul. so many things wrong or just twisted with our relationship i just don't know if its more cause of me or him. the thought of being perfect doesn't seem that bad at the moment even though i will never come anywhere close. but just the thought of never knowing sadness or pain feels really good. then again i now believe that angels are more human then we realize and there supposed to be perfect. i wish i just knew what to do. how can i say i love someone when i don't even mean it. i wish supernatural was real so i could just be like sam and dean go out and kill monsters. then again their life if pretty gruesome. but in the end they have each other and a ice cold rack. its strange the feeling of emptiness. its like hunger when your not hungry. sadness when you shed no tears. anger when theres no one to be angry at. put that all together with happiness when there is no reason to be happy. there are no words for it really. just empty. i with school was starting already so i could just get away from here and to my future. hopefully by then the emptiness will be filled with something. hopefully

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