dark queen

I don’t care about you.
Don’t judge my friends.
You don’t see them
you only see the clothes they wear
...

Standing on the bottom stair
Watching the world.
And waiting for the end
The every thing I want is right there
...

Blue dots on my paper that look like tears but aren’t.
Is this my soul telling me that it knows I’ve screwed up by letting you go?
I don’t even know my own feelings any more.
I’m dying inside from pain.
...

This is my soul screwed up, unhappy
this is my soul filled with sorrow and pain.
This is my heart filled with anger;
I hate you and there's nothing you can change.
...

Dark souls and pale flesh.
So different yet they belong together.
Delicate intricate outfits and large heavy chains.
They attract each other like the two sides of a magnet yet the same side.
...

dive, swim, float
swim as fast as you can
To leave you troubles far behind
On the land in the air
...

'where are your values? ' They scream
'How dare you stand for something I don’t belive in, '
thats what they are realy asking.
'how can you stand up for a guy who will do another guy?
...

Observe how he negotiates his way
With trust and the least violence, making the stranger friend, the enemy ally.
The depth that could destroy gently supports him. With water he defends himself from water.
Danger he leans on, rests in. The drowning sea is all he has between himself and drowning.
...

Beautiful poison
Savior and killer of my soul.
I wish for your name to be only mine.
Beautiful poison
...

blue roses and red daffodils
nothing makes sence any more
my life has turned upside down
and im not sure I want it to go back to normal
...

Memories of happiness
Memories of pain
Memories of screaming out
And crying in the rain
...

Scream my soul scream
His fingers going though you hair
Scream my soul scream
There’s blood everywhere
...

...

I am everywhere and nowhere
I am Schrödinger’s cat
Am I alive or dead?
I don’t know anymore
...

*this poem is dedicated to my dear cousin Emily, and forgotten days of youth*

You hit me ill hit you back
I'll slap you silly with a smack
...

*to Derek; may you rot in hell*

You pushed away from me
You saw me in my pain
...

Sitting here quietly no one notices me
I’m just the shy stupid girl.
Doesn’t do very well in school.
She’s a major disappointment to her parents.
...

Hello.
I am lost.
I am nameless and confused.
my mental stability is gone of course.
...

Sing of love in a million words
love me like you did
sing of love and sing of sadness
sing of pain and heartache
...

Wondering why I love you
Wondering why you love me
You hurt me once before
I hurt you because of that
...