Clarence Williams Poems

I.......can't........ play........this game....with u, called pretend, like were in grade school at the age of ten, and I'm thinking this situation here can drive a person to do something very surprising. Because of u playing with someone emotion, but you get off! ! ! and get a kick out of a person thats interest in you. When you no got *** well deep in your ******* heart! ! ! !  that the feelings is not mutual.  you market the bull **** word(pretend) for your own selfish reason or just for the sake of not loosing him.
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I was left shaking my head in disbelief, was shock of what was happening to me. Trying my best to stomach the fact of what I  was told started to make me sick it zapped the energy right out of  my body, that mentally Clarence couldn't move. And I stood there for sometime wishing that I could birth a clue....... But still nothing, nothing  nothing! ! ! ! what do you do? when faced with tragic news that leave you in a paralyze state of mind rap around you like yellow tape.
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I saw you sleeping 
Like you hadn't  slept in years,
In the hospital bed
And I guess I wanted to wake you up for the sake of my tears, but it fell! ! ! ! ! ! I think of the great times we laugh, sing, and dance and the party didn't start unless we were there, but most importunely when we gather with the family.
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I thought I didn't have the strength to love again! ! ! !  
I didn't believe in the power of love until you came in my life and loved what I thought was gone in me. 
The person who became covered with seasons of unwanted stuff and I felt like I gave so much of me that I became empty.
And it was at that place that I just wanted to give up on love because I felt that love  didn't love me no more, and was sent to drain my heart to the very core.
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        You exist only in your light that you created. And here the sound of your sadness cry aloud in your dark space, the shadows of witch you bare witness  are people like images of the pain  that exist on thee inside of you, and there you smile at thee image and call it a her, and when you get a clear view it's really images of your hurt. 
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I need for you to hear me!
I know, I know, I know I must admit, that we started out with an agreement that were going to have a sexual relationship without attachments. And I thought I could handle just being friends with benefits! !  

You wouldn't believe going in this I just wanted my needs to be mat just like you! ! ! ! and I didn't have a clue that I started
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I don't know everything

I came to the place that my mouth went fast-forward in the mist of my thinking, I allow how I felt emotionally that I didn't pace my self slowly and let things happen naturally and  I must admit that I'm sorry! ! !

Because I started to think that it's most about me! ! ! And thinking about my needs, my needs, my needs! ! ! That if I waited patiently while you sat quietly for you to speak to me I would have gotten thee answer to what I need!  
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The pain, my tears, my fears, I felt the boy the man who drowns in  sand. I need a hand to pull me out,  the boy, the man who cries with a shout.Aloud to hear thee echoes of pain, trapped in time the boy who lives inside the man. Trying to cope and stay a float,
  but feel myself  withering away in to my deep polluted thoughts of what happen to me as child on yesterday. Being in the present of the folks who caused the hurt, and people sitting and  faking like you have no idea why they left the church.!
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